Ever since I got back to Nigeria after University and A-levels, my eyes have seriously opened. Everything is so different here the girls are so thirsty and the men have no shame. I mean I have heard things but I never knew it was that deep until I experienced it first hand. Mind you I love a guy who can treat his girl right and I have my dirty habits, some people like to call me a pothead. My friend even told me that she is dedicating ‘the girls on drugs’ song by Wale to me, LOL…
Clearly I have made my mistakes and am still making them, but as a single babe trying to date in Lagos city, oh my goodness I have had some weird encounters. Randy old men trying to talk to me, people actually trying to pick me up from the road and many of the girls I come across are into all these things so can you really blame these men? I don’t know but at the very least you should not just jump to conclusions that a girl is a prostitute just because she is dressed in shorts. That is why I love England, because nobody cares what you wear, I feel soo free when I am over there.
I remember vividly one day when I was walking maybe just like ten blocks away from my friend’s house to the KFC in Victoria Island in Lagos and I had a camisole and my most comfortable denim shorts on.
I did not think they were too short but well I guess I was wrong. Can you believe that people actually followed me down the street and were yelling ‘ashewo’, which is a Nigerian word for prostitute, I had people horning at me and basically acting rude, I was so confused that day, and the worst thing is many of them actually believe that it is true, I once had someone say to me, “you can generally tell who a ‘runz’ babe is by her appearance or how she dresses, they usually have long hair like ‘mami water’, bleach, chew gum and wear revealing clothes”. I was just totally dazed by the ignorance in that statement, to say the least. What even annoys me the most is that Nigeria is generally a hot country so why should there be any need for judgement when people decide to show a little skin?
Anyway please excuse my ranting but I am just speaking my mind. Another thing is everything is so different. When I was in England I lived alone for about 6 years so to come back and have to live with my parents, I mean that is just depressing, Sigh.
My name is Tolani Akinyemi, but you can call me Tola. I am 22 and play by my own rules. I live somewhere on the mainland in Lagos called Ikeja. Now life is good and all but the mainland is one of the most inconvenient places to live in Lagos, because everything happens on the Island! And you know how lagos is, everything is so stressful and involves hustling, I work in the Corporate Social Responsibility department of a Bank on the Island, so just imagine the traffic I have to face everyday just to get to work and back.
Anyway, one fateful Monday morning, I had just spent close to 3 hours in traffic and I even ended up getting to work late, so I was tired and on edge. The General manager in my office Mr Tade noticed I was not looking too happy, so he came up to me to find out how I was doing. This man has always generally been nice to me so I thought he was just a kind man, although sometimes he is overly nice but I just figured some people could be like that sometimes.
Tade: Hello Tola you don’t look too good, is everything all right?
Me: I’m okay, just a little bit cranky; I have been in traffic all morning, I am really just tired of Nigeria and all the stress that comes with it.
Tade: Hmm but if traffic is your problem, you know I have a guest house just across the street, there is never anyone there, I just go there to cool off sometimes, if you want you can stay there for as long as you need to.
This was weird, I hardly knew this man and he was already offering me a place to stay. Although this was what I always wanted, it just felt a bit suspicious accepting it from someone I hardly knew and who was about 50 something years old. What will I even tell my parents? does this even make sense? I wondered…
See you next thursday x